I've been preoccupied for the past few days trying to find a reasonable way out of Thailand. I finally managed to book a Thai Airways flight in a couple of days. In case anyone else is still looking for options, I recommend going to the Thai Airways HQ on Vibhavadi Rangsit Road in Bangkok. They have emergency counters set up on the ground floor of Building 3, with lots of incredibly helpful staff who are doing an awesome job looking after stranded travellers. Seriously, they were fantastic.
On a more positive note, I did manage to get a few dives in while I was in Phuket. Khun Ake, a friend of mine, took this photo of me with a manta ray. My friends and I were the only ones to see the manta up close, when it swam right under us after we had surfaced. Of course, we dumped air immediately and went back down. The site was West of Eden at Similans island seven.